Bushwacked!
I'm a week late on this, but this story is too damn good not to talk about.
Cleveland Indian Pitcher Scott Sauerbeck was arrested last week after being pulled over by the cops, running out of the car and hiding in the bushes.
Apparrently Scott let his Drunk Slumpbuster Mistress drive his hoopty '66 Lincoln Town Car, she blew a .253 blood alocohol level and probably something else as well.

I'd say thats enough alcohol to kill off any potential STD's.

I wasn't familiar with Mr. Sauerkraut before but I gotta give him some very entusiastic props for the junior high moustache, well done.